The question, “What is it to be alive today?” is perhaps the most profound human inquiry. As we navigate the end of the year, this question often feels obscured by external demands. There is also a constant, low level hum of anxiety. Society frequently suggests that our meaning lies in our capacity to produce, achieve, and solve. If we are not performing, we are told we are not enough.

This perspective, as Associate Therapist Madison Parikka, M.A., AMFT, notes, reduces us to little more than “blips” in the grand scheme. We shared this reflection in this month’s newsletter and also shared it below. However, if we shift our focus, we can discover a quieter and more powerful truth. The deep meaning of life is rooted not in solving, but in the radical power of simply being. This belief affirms that existence carries intrinsic value. This belief is also the foundation of genuine healing.

However, if we shift our focus, we can discover a quieter, more powerful truth: that the deep meaning of life is rooted not in the solving, but in the radical power of simply being. This belief that existence carries its own intrinsic value is the foundation of genuine healing.

Psychological Sovereignty: Countering the Scarcity Narrative

The core psychological challenge in late fall is the convergence of anticipatory stress (worry about future holidays) and the pervasive scarcity narrative (the belief that resources are limited and we are fundamentally lacking). This pressure is particularly acute when individuals are also facing real world financial or relational stress.

The Internal Cost of Scarcity

When external circumstances, be they financial, relational, or time based, feel constrained, the mind defaults to a scarcity mindset. This is a defense mechanism that originates in the nervous system’s perception of threat. It often manifests internally as:

• Hypervigilance: The nervous system constantly scans the environment for threats or missed opportunities.
• Controlling Behavior: A desperate attempt to manage the uncontrollable future, which frequently leads to emotional exhaustion and burnout.
• Shame and Isolation: The belief that lacking “enough” is a personal failure, leading to a damaging retreat from community and crucial support.

The therapeutic goal is not to eliminate external challenges, but to guide clients toward Psychological Sovereignty: the recognition of one’s intrinsic worth and the inherent right to safety and support, independent of income, job title, or performance reviews. This concept is deeply rooted in Humanistic Therapy, which champions every person’s innate drive toward self actualization and growth.

The Radical Act of Noticing

To reclaim this sovereignty, we must practice the therapeutic act of noticing.

Madison Parikka suggests we observe the natural world, such as a hummingbird, a sleeping cat, or a patch of moss. These beings hold inherent value by simply existing. This practice pulls us away from performance-based judgment and anchors us in what is rich and immediate. This shift reflects the CMP philosophy that healing comes from engaging the body, the breath, and the wisdom of the whole self.

The Emotional Ecosystem: Redefining Our Relational Role

Madison’s reflection encourages a radical redefinition of how we contribute to the world. She suggests that our emotional and relational acts are essential parts of a larger Emotional Ecosystem. Systems Therapy supports this idea and views each person not as a silo but as part of an interconnected system of family, partnership, and community.

Therapeutic Redefinitions of Effort

In therapy, we can re-author the impact of our everyday actions:

• The Pollination of Joy: Just as a hummingbird pollinates flowers, calling a friend out of the blue, simply because you thought of them, is an act of relational vitality, pollinating joy and connection in your community.
• Supporting Internal Biodiversity: When we allow ourselves a moment of rest, set a compassionate boundary, or have a solo dance party in the kitchen, we are protecting our energy and supporting our internal biodiversity, preventing the erosion of our mental health. This directly aligns with the goal of ANS Regulation Techniques, which support emotional and physiological balance by shifting the nervous system from a threat response to a state of calm.
• Releasing Emotional Residue: Our willingness to process difficult feelings (the grief, the fear) rather than suppressing them creates space for the emotional ecosystem to reset. The body is an incredible storage space for emotional experiences and residue ; learning to release this tension is a conscious, embodied practice.

Our seemingly small, imperfect acts of existing, dreaming, dancing, and connecting are not peripheral; they are the essential functions that sustain the ecosystem of relationship and self.

Narrative Therapy: Rewriting the Story of Scarcity

For clients who feel overwhelmed by the stories of scarcity or failure, Narrative Therapy offers a powerful roadmap for change. This modality is well suited to address both the financial crunch and the pressure of the holiday season, helping clients rewrite the internal script that says, “I am not enough.” Narrative Therapy is a non blaming approach that separates the person from the problem.

Core Narrative Techniques for Resilience:

1. Externalization: This technique separates the person from the problem. Instead of internalizing failure, the problem is externalized. The person stops thinking, “I am a failure because I have financial anxiety.” They begin seeing it as, “The scarcity anxiety is trying to influence my decisions.” This shift reduces shame and helps the client take a more objective and empowered stance toward the challenge.
2. Mapping Unique Outcomes: Narrative work actively searches for moments that contradict the dominant, problem-saturated story. Did you find the strength to set a boundary when you were exhausted? That is evidence of your resourcefulness and agency, creating a foundation for a new, preferred story of the self.
3. Co-Authoring: The therapist works with the client to strengthen a new narrative that is rooted in their values, abilities, and hopes, positioning the client as the active author of their life, rather than a passive recipient of circumstances.

Watch Madison’s Video

More from Madison:

• A Day in the Life of Mindful Therapy: Video
• A Love Letter to Therapy
• A Handful of Quiet by Thích Nhất Hạnh, a review